Aimee’s Random Thoughts: Carol Ann Witte Allen

14 February 2007

Carol Ann Witte Allen :: May 27, 1941-January 7, 2007

For my Mom's funeral I went through boxes of old pictures and selected the best ones for display. I created four big boards full of pictures. I've spent most of the last two days scanning those pictures (all 201 of them) and creating CDs to give to other family members. It has been good for me to go through all those pictures again, but it's been emotionally draining.

Anyway, I'd like to share some of my favorites with you.

When Mom was four her family took a vacation to Niagara Falls. Here she is by the Maid of the Mist. Something that really struck me in many of the pictures I scanned was her enthusuasm for life. I can feel the energy and passion in her early pictures. She was a child who enjoyed being a child. There are some great expressions in her pictures.

Hmmmmm..... What do you think 5-year-old Carol is thinking? LOL

Ah ha! That's what she's thinking!

Here is Mom when she was 7 with her Dad. She always adored her Daddy—she & her sister Sharon called him Daddy until the day he died.

She apparently had a great Christmas when she was 5. There are a ton of pictures from that year. I especially like this picture. She is holding her dolly so tenderly and standing in front of her new dollhouse.

OK, here's a bizarre one. Why are my Mom & her friend Joan dressed like Indians and posing with the mailman?

I am reading and journaling through a great book right now. Captivating: Unveiling the Mystery of a Woman's Soul is a book that explains the God-given desires of every woman's heart: to be romanced, to play an irreplaceable role in a great adventure and to unveil beauty. As I read it (I'm only on chapter one. LOL) so much of my mother's life makes sense.

This picture makes me sad. Mom is 4-and-a-half and dressed for trick-or-treating. Now, maybe there are four-year-old girls out there who don't want to dress like a princess/ballet dancer/fairy/queen/bride/beauty, but I am certain that my Mom was not one of them. My Mom was a girly-girl who longed to be found beautiful in the eyes of the world. (Like every woman.) I am certain that she did not choose this costume. I will never truly understand the dynamics between Mom & Grandma, but I know that Mom never felt fully accepted and loved. She was devoted to her mother, but she struggled her whole life with their relationship.

Here she is on Easter Day in 1953. She was almost 12. I hope she felt beautiful this day. I hope she felt like the most beautiful girl in church that morning. I hope she twirled a few times and pleasured in her God-given beauty.

My brother got married in 1999. For their reception, he and Pam decided to have a costume ball. (It was the best reception ever!) My Mom and Dad (at my Mom's decision) dressed as a Civil War couple. (It was so my Mom could wear a beautiful dress. But, she wouldn't let my Dad carry a real sword. LOL) She ended up hating how she looked in the dress. (described herself as "two-ton Tilly.") But, I think (I hope) she still enjoyed herself that day.

And, here is why she viewed herself as fat later in life. She was 5'9" tall and weighed 110 pounds most of her life. (I'm only 5'7" and I haven't weighed 110 pounds since sometime in Junior High. Makes me sick! LOL)

Mom was in the Civil Air Patrol in her teens. Here she is a drill competition when she was 17. (I don't know if she won.) (This is the sad thing about having pictures jumbled in a box. The stories are gone. I am vigilant about scrapbooking: putting our photos in albums and writing the stories alongside. This is why. I want my children to know their history. I want them to have visual reminders to remember their past.)

Mom made everything for us. She made our clothes, she cooked everything from scratch, she created special things for special events. She was a creator, a doer. This is my brother's birthday. I don't know how old he was—maybe 3? I'm sure she was quite pleased with this cake she made.

In her later years she focused her creative energies and desire for beauty in her gardens. She won an award last summer for her flower gardens. She was so proud. And she had every right to be. She took a barren plot of land in the middle of nowhere and created an oasis that was breathtaking. This picture shows her standing at the entrance to her largest garden.

Here are some more garden pix. (Proud daughter.)

The garden is where I will miss my Mom the most. I planted flowers and plants with her. We would talk for hours on end about what she was going to plant each year. We would pour through seed catalogs and walk around the property talking about how it would look. My Mom had the gift of being able to envision what it would look like. She could do this with anything. She could look at a patch of dirt and see the future. She could see the flowers and plants clearly in her mind. In the house, she could look at a room and mentally rearrange the furniture into a perfect fit. She could also look at a room and see how it would look when it was remodeled. Fortunately my Dad was able to do that remodeling. In the kitchen of our house on Richie Avenue, she had him move the sink, the back door and a window. It made the room a totally different room. It was an amazing gift she had. (And one that would wear my Dad down at times. LOL)

Here is my Aunt Sharon & Mom with their Mother, Henrietta. Every year on the Saturday before Mother's Day, my Aunt (from Chicago) & Mom would drive to Toledo, Ohio and plant flowers for their mother. All three always enjoyed the day.

OK, some family photos:
Easter Day, 1972 in front of Grandma & Grandpa's trailer. Left to right in the back: Uncle Frank (Aunt Sharon must be taking the picture) Grandpa Bert (he died one-and-a-half years after this picture. I never really knew him. He was the one my Mom called Daddy until he died.) Grandma Henrietta, Dad, Mom, and the adorable baby in her arms is me. In the front is Shelly and Jeff (my sister and brother.)

This one was taken in 1979 in front of our house. From left to right in the back: Dad, Jeff, Mom. In the front: Shelly, me. I was 8 and quite pleased to be wearing my hand-me-down David Cassidy t-shirt.

Here we are sometime in the late 80's. (My mother was terrible about labeling photos!) My Mom liked this picture so much that she blew it up to 5x7's and gave each of us a copy.

Here is Mom and Dad on her birthday in 1984. She was 43.

Christmas, 2000. Mom & Dad, and Sophie-bird in their “new” house out in the country.

Our wedding: August 18, 1990. Mom was still making clothes. She made the dress she is wearing. She was going to make my wedding dress, but when we priced it out it was going to be much less expensive to just buy a dress.

I saved this picture for last. I love this picture. I made it the wallpaper on my computer. This was taken at my Mom's birthday party when she turned 7. The girls from left to right: Carol Witte (my Mom,) Bonnie Kieff (not sure if I'm spelling that right—Grandma was good about labeling the backs of photos, but her handwriting is a bit hard to read) Nancy Krise, Elfrieda Bauch, and Gail Blessing. I can't tell you exactly what I like so much about this photo. It's not so much that it's my Mom, but just the girls themselves. This picture just captures the essence of childhood for me. I can't explain it any better than that. That it was taken at my Mom's birthday party, makes it that much more special to me.

Well, if you've read this far, I'm impressed. Thanks for taking this little journey with me. I miss my Mom. I know that she's in paradise now and I know that God is the God of all and will help me through my grief, but the pain is still real and I miss her a lot. I wish all of you well. Now, go hug someone you love. :)
Aimee

Labels: My Mom

posted by Aimee @ 5:25 AM

6 Comments:

At February 14, 2007 1:23 PM, Susanna said…

Aimee, thank you for sharing this on your blog. Those pictures are amazing, and they all convey so much. Her garden is beautiful!

You are in my prayers each day. Thank you again for sharing this with those of us who read your blog.
At February 15, 2007 8:51 AM, Anonymous said…

aimee...thank you for sharing your moms memories....they are so beautiful! What a blessing it is for you to have loved and be loved by her! Your spirit always makes me smile! Loveyou! Amy
At February 15, 2007 12:41 PM, Anonymous said…

Aimee - What a wonderful tribute. Thinking of you. Traci
At February 16, 2007 6:50 AM, Anonymous said…

Carol would have loved your tribute.

Love Dan and Judy
At February 18, 2007 7:06 AM, Aaron said…

It's always a powerful testimony when a person gets to the end of her life and is so dearly loved by her children. It means that she lived beyond herself.

Thanks for sharing your tribute. You and your family remain in my prayers.
At March 02, 2007 9:14 PM, Unknown said…

Aimee,
I'm so sorry about your Mom. Although I never met her, your tribute is so touching. As an aside, I came across your blog TOTALLY by accident, but I think I know you (or rather, I knew you!). I graduated from Miami as a Music Ed. Major in 1991. I was Lisa Beringer then. God does bring people together in strange ways! I hope you are well. My email is theworkingdiva(at)yahoo(dot)com.
Peace!